Obituary of Mary Gouveia

Mary Catherine Gouveia, a woman devoted to her family, passed away peacefully in her home Friday morning, October 24, 2014 after a long illness, during which she was cared for by her family. She was 91 years old. Mary was born in Boston, the daughter of Italian immigrants, the late Salvatore and Catherine Marashio. She grew up in Lexington and was a graduate of Lexington High School. She married Serry Gouveia in April of 1946 and they called New Bedford and Charlestown home before settling in Burlington in 1960. Mary worked part-time, helping a friend in a corporate restaurant and also performed accounting work at American Optical; however, her primary role was taking care of her family. She was the matriarch of her family teaching her children and grandchildren the values and traits that would help guide them in life including: respect for others, hard work, putting family first, showing compassion to those in need, and always looking for the good in others. It was her strong maternal strength and wisdom that made her such an incredible role model and the glue that kept the Gouveia family together. Her home was always filled with her children’s friends, who also called her “MA” and the wonderful smells of all the foods she loved to cook. Mary enjoyed taking in the fall foliage when at its peak. She loved family gatherings, and the holidays, with Thanksgiving being her favorite, just knowing she would be surrounded by family and friends. She always placed others before herself and was a loving caregiver. Even in her illness, she was more concerned about her family’s well-being than her own. She considered herself a fortunate woman, for she had a wonderful home, a devoted husband of over 60 years, 5 loving children, 11 delightful grandchildren and 4 great-grandchildren. Mary was the beloved wife of the late Seraphim “Serry” Gouveia. She was the loving mother of Robert & his wife Nancy of Burlington; Debra Kelly & her husband Richard of Byfield; Steven & his wife Stacey of Derry, NH; Thomas & his wife Carol of Dracut; and Serry & his wife Manuela of Billerica. She was the mother-in-law of the late Stephen Rochon. She was predeceased by her brothers; late Paul and Ignacio Marashio. Mary was the proud grandmother of Daniel, Michelle; Jason Plant, Kevin,Stephen & Stephanie Rochon; Jonathan, Leah; Christina; Madison & Serry Jr. and great -grandmother of Nathan, Allison, Tyler, and Carter. Funeral from the Edward V. Sullivan Funeral Home, 43 Winn Street, Burlington (exit 34 off Rt. 128/95, Woburn side) on Tuesday Oct. 28 at 9 a.m. Followed by a Mass of Christian Burial in St. Barbara’s Church, 138 Cambridge Rd, Woburn at 10 a.m. Visiting hours Monday at the Edward V. Sullivan Funeral Home from 4-8 p.m. Interment in Pine Haven Cemetery, Burlington. Family Remembrance by Madison After my grandmother’s passing and the making of the decision that I would be the one standing before each of you today, I made sure to spend the next few days in preparation listening to all that people had to say of one of the most amazing women I’ve ever met. We all sat around her kitchen table and exchanged memories, some accompanied by tears, some laughter. We looked at photographs and recalled the “good old days” which were seemingly a different time for everybody. I went back to a particular memory: I sat in the kitchen with her talking about how something in life hadn’t gone my way, she looked at me and said “You know what I always say Madison Taylor everything happens for a reason.” As I looked around at my aunts, uncles, cousins and parents, as I listened to their stories and watched them connect with one another I couldn’t help but smile in the midst of all the sadness. She had brought us together to eat and talk and laugh and love, like she had so many holidays before, just one more time, and I knew she was up there looking down on us, smiling at what she had done. It was clear to me that though she was no longer sitting in the room with us, I could take comfort in knowing that my grandmother was there in everyone. In our minds, through memories, in our hearts through love, and in our actions through all that she taught us. She left us with far more than just memories; she left us with values, and she left us with the most important thing anyone has in this world: family. Of her 91 years I was fortunate enough to experience 20, though I wish I could have 91 more. As I sat in her home without her for the first time, my mind rapidly raced through scores of memories of those 20 years. I remembered the summer days spent with her and Papa while my parents worked, I remembered the countless hours with my cousins spent listening to Backstreet Boys under that roof, I remembered Easter baskets, I remembered begging my mom to make salad the way she did, with the broccoli in it, I remembered rolling meatballs, I heard her “ya ya” and stories beginning with “I tell ya...” I remembered running to her when I was too young to understand Papa’s sarcasm. She was someone we all knew we could always run to. Though her life was far from easy, she found beauty and passion in the simplest of things. When asked about her childhood, rather than recall the difficulties she faced with the early loss of her parents, she talked about the simple things which brought her joy. Rollerskating, playing with dolls and her favorite activity: waking up early to milk cows on the farm. She was “little Mary” but her heart was big. She taught us all that it didn’t matter what life threw at you, as long as you made the best of it and if you had family to love, then you had it all. As I listened to the stories being told round the room, and the memories being recounted, I listened to the things people had to say about my grandmother. The things that seemed to trend were: Accepting. Unconditional Love. Good cook. Best friend. : Accepting. : She always greeted you with a hug and a kiss and a “how ah ya hun?” whether she’d known you all her life or you’d just met. She didn’t ask the question out of habit, she asked because she cared. She was accepting of everyone and her home was always open to the new friends, boyfriends, and girlfriends who would soon become family. It never mattered what hardships you faced, where you came from, mistakes you made, if you were apart of the lives of her children and grandchildren, you were family and you were loved. She was everybody’s second mother, “Ma”. She never passed judgement, and encouraged each of her children and grandchildren to become their own person. And no matter what, each of those people was someone she was proud of. : Unconditional Love: I think people tend to use this term lightly. But with my grandmother it doesn’t even say enough. Yes she was accepting of others and those outside of her family. But it is a truly remarkable thing to treat people the way my grandmother did. She set an example we should all strive to follow. The kind of wife who so deeply loved her husband, every day, even after he was gone. And he loved his beetle. The kind of grandmother who never forgot to let her granddaughters know they were beautiful. The kind of grandmother who couldn’t hide the joy in her face or the light in her eyes when presented with grandchildren and great-children. The kind of mother who would walk through an avalanche for her children, or at least drive through a blizzard for a hockey jacket that would be lost within 24 hours. Way to go, Dad (: But she loved you anyway. She loved each and every single person as much as the other and certainly far more than she loved herself. : Good cook. : Spaghetti. Fried meatballs. Peppers and Eggs. Stuffed Artichokes. Kale Soup. Raviolis at Thanksgiving. Monday diets. A love for seafood and good dessert. If there’s one thing that caused my grandmother’s face to light up that wasn’t her family, it was her food. Preparing it. Cooking it. Eating it. Food always brought a smile to her face and her food brought people together. Whether it was the fried meatballs we all tried to sneak off the tray before she’d put them into the sauce, you know, when she’d swat your hand away and say no! no! or the most incredible and delicious Thanksgiving table display she loved to cook and we loved her cooking, almost as much as we love her. : Best friend. : If you wanted to talk about absolutely anything or simply watch TV game shows until 3 a.m. she was there. If you needed advice, she had the wisdom. If anyone would believe in you and your wildest dreams it was her, and she’d encourage you to chase them. She was always proud of every accomplishment no matter how big or how small and she never, ever let anyone forget how much she loved them, she made sure you knew how much you meant to her. Her doors were always open for a friend, and her arms were always open for a hug. Whether you were an extended family member, one of her children, grandchildren or great grandchildren, she knew how to be the best friend you always needed by your side. The kind of friend any friend would be lucky to have. The kind of friend we all should be. : And so to everyone, I can only hope that we carry on her most loved characteristics. To my aunt and uncles, her children, may you carry on the unconditional love she instilled in each of you; to the sons and daughters in law may you accept others the way she wholeheartedly accepted each of you; and to my cousins, her little chickadees, may we take what we’ve learned from her and instill each of these values in our own families and all of the relationships we foster, may we be as loving, accepting and kindhearted as she. May we all use her example to learn the type of friend to be, and may we all, attempt, to cook as well as she did. : I think it is far too often the case that we forget to fully appreciate people until we have lost them. With my grandmother, this was never the case. She touched the life of every single person with whom she came into contact in a way that can only be understood by the individual, but will never be forgotten. She was somebody very special to everybody. : Mary, “Little Mary”, Beetle, Mom, Ma, Gram. : We love you.