Obituary of Douglas Stafford

Calling hours will be at the Edward V Sullivan Funeral Home, 43 Winn Street, Burlington, MA 01810 from 4-8 Friday, February 6. Services will be at United Church of Christ Congregational, 6 Lexington Street, Burlington, MA on Saturday, February 7 at 11 am. There will be a memorial at the United Nations in early June. The family requests that any donations be made to Unicef, Cystic Fibrosis, or Doctors Without Borders. M. Douglas Stafford died peacefully on Sunday, February 1st at 12:45 pm at age 81 after a lengthy and arduous battle beginning with renal cancer 14 years ago. Born on 29 September 1933 in Syracuse, New York to George Stafford, of New York State, and Jeanette Martin Stafford, of New York State, he leaves a family of relations and friends that spread worldwide, with an influence to match. Doug’s sister, Nancy Stafford Milburn is married to Richard Milburn and lives in Winchester, MA. Their two daughters are Sarah, with children Emma and Merlin, and Anne, married with 2 children, Jasper and Ronin. Married three times, his first wife, Virginia Dyer Stafford, died in 1988 after 33 years of marriage. They had two sons: Martin Douglas Stafford II (Duke), 57, married to Meg Stafford and living in Littleton, MA, have two daughters Gale Virginia Stafford and Kate Martin Stafford. Robert George Stafford, 55, engaged to Katherine Shanor, lives on Martha’s Vineyard, and has one son Douglas Farnsworth Stafford. Doug’s second marriage of 19 years was to Valerie Riley Farnsworth Stafford until her death in 2008. She has three children, Charles Farnsworth, married with two children and three grandchildren, Mark Farnsworth, married with one child, and Wendy (Farnsworth) Carroll with one child, Douglas. Doug leaves his third wife of nearly 3 years, Anne Drover Stafford. She has five children (one deceased). Kerrin Frank, married to Glenn Frank, with children Jordan, Jenna and Cameron, Doug Hookway, deceased in 1997, one daughter, Shannon, William Hookway, Kevin Hookway, married to Carol Hookway, with children Jackson, Bethany and Mitchell, and Cheryl Patron, married to Mathew Patron with children Tyler and Zachary. After graduating from Cornell’s School for Industrial and Labor Relations, Doug’s remarkable career began with 3 years in the Navy aboard the USS Cacapon where he met lifelong friends. He began his civilian career at IBM where he stayed for 3 years before joining the Peace Corps and acting as Country Deputy Director in Liberia and Ghana. After he and his family returned from these two years in Africa he was Director of Administration of Peace Corps in Washington DC. Following this he spent a year with a principal role in Family Health Care, Inc. and then two years as Vice President for Administration at State University of New York at New Paltz College. Doug returned to Washington to work as comptroller at the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. After his time at EEOC he went to work at the United Nations Development Program as Director of Finance and Deputy Assistant Administrator, Bureau of Finance and Administration. Later he was appointed Deputy High Commissioner for the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, located in Geneva. Doug returned to Washington to complete his career of public service at the State Department as a Clinton appointee, where he was Assistant Administrator for Food and Humanitarian Assistance at the U.S. Agency for International Development. Doug met and at times served with dignitaries such as Kofi Annan, Nelson Mandela, Desmond Tutu, the Dalai Lama, the Queen of Spain and many others. But it was working with his revered staff and colleagues, sleeves rolled up and in the trenches that fueled his fire. He wasn’t living if he didn’t have an issue to tackle. He brought his intense passion for people, his direct and colorful way of speaking and fearless enthusiasm for championing his staff and what is right to every job, and every situation in his life. His charismatic presence, marked by a deep conviction in bringing a better life to all people, drew in friends from every job and every place he lived, creating a kaleidoscope of devoted, fascinating and loving friends. His pride and abiding love for his family was always crowned by the respect and love he accorded his wife. His sometimes larger than life presence will be remembered and celebrated by many with unbounded respect and the same quick smile he brought to all relationships. It is not the vacuum he leaves, but rather the rich fabric of life that marks his passing.